Excerpt About Holes
Filling Holes with OthersWhen we relate to someone else in a deep way – the deeper it is, the more this happens – we fill those holes with the other person. Some of our holes get filled with what we believe or feel we’re getting from the other person. We feel valued because this person appreciates us, and this fills our holes. We don’t know consciously that we’re filling it with their appreciation, we just feel full when we’re with them; we feel valuable. So, when I am with that person, I really feel I am valuable, but unconsciously I feel the other person has my value. The other person not only makes me feel valuable, but whatever the other person is giving me, is part of me, is part of that fullness that I experience.