Excerpt About Mental Relationships

The Mind Does Not Allow Us to Keep the Totality of the Relationship in Perspective

The real relationship usually contains elements of all three kinds of mental relationships. With any human being there is satisfaction, fulfillment, and love, there is some negativity, anger, and hatred, and there is frustration. The real relationship is the relationship where these three are acknowledged, where the person realizes, “Yes, of course, I love this person, but I know he is angry at me,” or “I do not like this or that, but I still like her anyway.” Even when we are feeling rejected or hated or hateful, it does not make us forget that we love each other. But in the moment that the other person hates us, our normal tendency is to forget that he or she loves us. The moment that we are hurt, we forget that we love the other person. It is difficult to keep the whole thing together. The mind does not allow us to keep the totality of the relationship in perspective. The mind is always trying to protect itself by splitting relationships into purely good or purely bad components. It is very difficult for the mind to allow the perception of the complete, real relationship that exists.

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